Every wedding is an historic moment. Martin Shervington and Elisa Evans, however, got married in a ceremony that was historic not only for them, but for all of us as well. Technology does not always mesh well with matters of the heart – “Honey, put your phone away! We’re in bed.” “Stop texting! Are you even listening to me?!” – but it’s hard to discount technology’s emotional relevance when it allows us to be present at the wedding of someone dear and far without stepping on a plane, or even out of the house. This is the power of virtual reality, a technology that’s already here, if not widely recognized. Martin and Elisa harnessed that power, with the help of AltSpace, the leading social platform for virtual reality, and on May 25, held the first wedding in virtual reality.
If you’ve never been to a virtual reality wedding before – a category which includes everyone on Earth except the three hundred people who attended the Shervington nuptials – first, you’ll need a headset. What feels like a slightly bulkier SCUBA mask has a screen inside, which tricks your eyes – and then your brain – into believing that you’re somewhere else entirely. The great news is, no matter how silly you feel, no one else at the wedding sees you with your headset on. They’ll only see your avatar – the digital figure representing you in the virtual world – so pick a good one; just don’t pick the same one as the bride. While wearing white may be rude, wearing the bride’s body is just plain confusing. It also makes it rather difficult to identify the bride, especially when she’s mingling with everyone before the ceremony – something you almost never find IRL. At Martin and Elisa’s wedding, the bride and groom actually wore the exact same bodies, in white with different accent colors – blue for him, pink for her. And a guest had the same avatar in black with a yellow accent.
Thanks to the help of usernames – which show up when you focus directly on someone’s avatar – at the start of the event, the happy couple could be found on the deck of what most resembles a dark red indoor-outdoor spaceship floating amidst the clouds in a reddish-purple sky. Martin and Elisa were at the front of a drive of avatars – y’know, like a drove of horses – showing no evidence of either a “bride’s side” or a “groom’s side.” Everyone was facing a projector screen. Unlike at real world weddings, the wedding “slideshow” came at the beginning of the event and, in doing so, served an interesting purpose. Guests at this virtual reality wedding included friends of Martin and Elissa’s, like Miguel from Switzerland, a co-worker of Martin’s, and also complete strangers, like a gentleman from Virginia, who works night shifts in retail and logged on after getting home from work. Given the range of guests familiarity – or unfamiliarity – with the couple, the multimedia presentation that Martin prepared served as an opportunity for the guests to get to know the bride and groom, their personalities, their origin story, and their real human faces. It was also more than just a slideshow with youth soccer snapshots and summer camp photos. Martin, who works as writer and has a penchant for comedy, included an abundance of clips from comedic films and television shows, recounted the story of when he met Elissa on a blind date arranged by their friend Linda, and also showed regular ol’ photos, which, when seen in VR, appear quite novel – even shocking. It’s roughly the equivalent of the groom’s avatar showing up in a real-world wedding slideshow; difficult to see the resemblance between the flesh-faced and animated individuals, and a little hard to believe it’s really the same person.
The ceremony followed the slideshow and, as it began, the gathered avatars instinctively parted like the Red Sea, creating a de facto “aisle” for the bride to walk down. And walk down it she did, though not one foot in front of the other; her avatar of choice didn’t have feet. This was probably the first wedding at which one could accurately say, the bride literally floated down the aisle. When she got to the front – the same place she had been standing for the previous half hour – Martin was there waiting for her, along with Lisa Kotecki, AltSpace’s Universal-Life-Church-certified Community Manager certified, who officiated from Redwood City, CA. The first VR wedding raises an interesting question: if a ship’s captain can marry you on the open seas because it’s international waters, are there such things as international airwaves? And, if so, who, without further certification, is allowed to marry you there? Pilots? Astronauts? Radio DJs? Martin and Elisa hedged their bets and also had a local official from Wales marry them that same day.
“We have come together in the presence of your avatar community,” began Lisa, “which you can see right now is sending you so much love.” Lisa wasn’t just speaking metaphorically; at this wedding guests could actually send their love into the air to be seen, as emojis. It’s sort of like throwing rice or blowing bubbles, only more specific – hearts, smiley faces, applause – and you don’t have to wait for the ceremony to be over. Other unique twists to the traditional ceremony came at the crucial moments of “I do” and “You may kiss the bride.” Due to commercially available headset technology, most VR participants have hands but not individually moveable fingers. For example, you can move your fingers collectively to pick something up, but you can’t move them individually to beckon someone to come hither. So Martin and Elisa didn’t attempt to tackle the simple ritual of putting a ring on each others’ finger. Instead, they held hands, which is more easily possible, though not without its own challenges, specifically, physical challenges.
Martin and Elisa chose to be in close proximity IRL – specifically, at at Sunflower & I, a “flower studio-café bar-concert room” in Cardiff, Wales – even though physical proximity is not necessary in virtual reality. But as a result of making that choice, when they reached out to “hold hands” in virtual reality, their controllers touched in real life. And because of how the graphics are designed, there was a little gap between the two hands as if a forcefield were preventing them from touching completely.
The other physical challenge was the kiss. How hard can that be, you ask, after all, “a kiss is just a kiss.” Well, watching the wedding kiss play out brought to mind Romeo’s plaintive line in Act 1, Scene 5 of Romeo and Juliet, “Oh, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do,” only with an ironic twist. Martin and Elisa’s lips did exactly what their hands did: refused to touch. The bulky headsets they were wearing prevented their heads from getting close enough to make it happen. The couple could have taken off their headsets at that moment, but they didn’t want to “mess up their [VR] kits,” as Martin put it, and instead opted to wait until they’d officially wrapped up the ceremony to lock lips. Perhaps this is why Martin and Elisa didn’t stay too long at their virtual reception.
Once the ceremony was officially over, the projector screen came down to reveal a DJ booth, and the music came up. The DJ booth was manned by an “actual” DJ, by which I mean, the avatar seen in VR represented a real life DJ spinning live from Redwood City California. The music selection was fun, but the volume was less so. Just like parties IRL, at this one, the music was too loud to talk over. People had to shout to converse, only, in this virtual space, when they stepped outside to hear each other better, they didn’t. This was unusual in that most of the audio in AltSpace is spatial, meaning that if you’re ten feet from someone, you sound like you’re ten feet from someone. However, for the wedding, it seems AltSpace put the tunes in “presenter mode,” a special setting they use for event hosts so that everyone anywhere in the space can hear them. Since one of the major draws of social VR is connecting with others who could be anywhere in the world, future hosts of VR weddings may want to consider spatial audio for the DJ. Despite the music having forced prominence, people weren’t cutting a rug on the dance floor. It’s hard to say whether this had to do with the personal proclivities of attendees or the known limitations of their hardware – only folks with controllers would have a visual representation of any movement other than head-bobbing, and even that is fairly limited unless one has a motion-capture suit. Fortunately, dancing wasn’t the only fun activity. Instead of the oversized sunglasses and feather boas often found at receptions, this party boasted glow sticks and magic wands. Each left a trail – of color or sparkle – in the air for a few seconds after you waved it.
But the most magical thing left in the air after this wedding ceremony were the emotions. There’s a presence and proximity achieved through virtual reality that far exceeds what’s possible with captured video or even live-streaming. Being at Martin and Elisa’s wedding in virtual reality, you really felt like you were getting to know these people… because you were getting to know these people. While it wasn’t possible to see on people’s faces whether they were getting choked up or wiping away tears, those feelings were palpably in the air. As Martin put it during the vows, “Marriage is in the heart and, with you, I’ve found home.” Virtual reality is an excellent reminder that with weddings, as in life, it’s the people – and not the location – that really matter.
Article by Eve Weston